Admiring

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Last week, I stumbled upon a very cool skateboarding video, Altered Route with Kilian Martin. Did you know that about me? That I love watching skateboarders? And surfers? I can’t tell you how many times I’ve watched Dogtown and Z-Boys or YouTube videos on loops (Laird Hamilton, you slay me!), truth be told. The mesmerizing click and roll of wheels on pavement, hands skimming air and water, the ceaseless rolling of waves, I am dazzled and awed at what bodies can do, so much and so beautifully, against gravity and odds and nature.  Anyhoo, the video had the sweetest song playing, very atypical of what most would consider skateboarding music. Patrick Watson, “Adventures in Your Own Backyard.” I couldn’t get it out of my head, this stirring sound, so I bought the album and a couple of other songs and started playing them on a loop while I wrote.

Then, when that was not enough, I went to Patrick Watson’s website and clicked around, pushing the concert button to find the band would be in town in four short days. Tickets still available. Click-boom! The hubster and I were go-ing. Yup, yup.

We arrived at The Mission Theater to very little fanfare, hardly a line, a table steps from the small stage. The opening band, Cat Martino, was sweet, her voice very fine, with a slight eighties vibe, and Cat’s band mate Sven (who totally reminded us of Zach, Maren!) with some of the coolest tattoos I’ve ever seen – small birds flying all over the right side of his body. I love that kind of thought.

Then it was time for the main attraction. The theater went completely dark and Patrick Watson came out, each with two or three small lights attached to their fingers. They played “Lighthouse” (pretty sure), which starts with Patrick playing softly on the piano and singing before being joined by the rest of the band – a violin (Melanie Blair), a guitar (Simon Angell), a bass (Mishka Stein), and drums (Robbie Kuster), building and building to this marvelous explosion of sound.

And that was only the beginning.

I’ve seen a lot of shows in my time, many in venues like this one, two hundred people gathered around a stage. But those small spaces had nothing to do with the intimacy of the show. Last night, we were part of something, transported elsewhere, our collective souls stirred into one. It was tender, silly, raucous, rakish, and laugh out loud funny, and we were all in it together. Dazzlingly simple, too, a string of patio lights and long shadows cast, minstrel-style, upon the ceiling and walls.

Then there was the singing. The hypnotizing guitar and bass. The haunting violin. The dynamic drumming. A whole song, “Into Giants,” I think, when the band came into the audience, no amplification, standing single file, Patrick right in front of me, Mishka’s tattoo peeking from his t-shirted arm while he strummed the guitar, so close I could have lifted the sleeve and revealed its secret. They sang and stomped so powerfully that Robbie might as well have been playing the drums.

M A G I C A L. Really and truly. The best show of my life, and I yelled it out the window of the Mini as we zoomed home, Patrick smoking a cigarette on the corner. Yeah, that was me. And since the band hails from Montreal, I gotta say, “Merci mille fois!”

 

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Be the Light

The ultimate weakness of violence is that it is a descending spiral, begetting the very thing it seeks to destroy. Instead of diminishing evil, it multiplies it. Through violence you may murder the liar, but you cannot murder the lie, nor establish the truth. Through violence you may murder the hater, but you do not murder hate. In fact, violence merely increases hate. So it goes. … Returning hate for hate multiplies hate, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars. Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that.

Martin Luther King, Jr.

Hello dear readers,

How are you?  Wrapped up, warm and wonderful, I hope.  I am cold, despite a multitude of layers and a hat on my head.  And busy, writing, revising my novel, spending days in a flurry of words and fleeting thoughts.  It’s been rather lovely and satisfying, though all consuming, too.

The workers are done, the last out on Friday, and the quiet’s been blissful.  No more banging or wondering when someone will arrive.  No new dust being scattered by labor either, though plenty of the old dust is still getting kicked around.  I’m thinking we’ll have one of those furnace cleaners come after the new year, and then we will paint the basement, too, so very, very many gallons.

I’ve still not hung the pictures in the bathroom, nor decorated our house for the holidays, save two candles and a festive plaid cloth on the dining room table.  To be honest, I don’t really miss it.  I’m just so happy for quiet and grateful to get things done, that it doesn’t seem to matter.

In the evenings, after my mind is spent, and I’ve made some sort of soup for dinner, last night was possibly the best fish chowder, and the night before minestrone, I settle in on the sofa, knit, and watch movies.  It’s about all my little brain wants or can handle.  The hubster plays the piano (he’s learning music from Amelie), types away on his very old Commodore-64 in his new man-cave, or sits with me, a cat on his lap and mine.

It’s a wonderful life, sometimes busy and hectic, but mostly exactly what we want, and always good, lovely, and fine.

For Christmas when I was seven years old, I asked for, and quite thankfully received an alarm clock.  It was red metal with two charming brass bells on top and an unabashedly cheerful yellow happy face.  It lulled me to sleep with a marvelously sure and steady tick.  Though I didn’t really need and alarm clock at such a young age, as I was a naturally early riser, it came in handy.  I was an enormous fan of Jerry Lewis, and for reasons unknown to me at the time (but of which I am well aware now), his movies only came on at odd hours when everyone else was sleeping.  So I’d happily set my alarm, hear the pleasant ring, and go upstairs to cuddle under one of Great Aunt Mary’s crocheted afghans on the sofa and laugh and delight at Mr. Lewis, and if I was lucky, his friend Dean Martin.  Sometimes my brother Chris would join me, and we’d laugh together at Jerry falling upstairs or infuriating Dean.

Then, in 1980, I became obsessed with a certain preschool teacher named Diana and her handsome Prince Charles (Yes handsome, and I still find him so).  Once again, I wound my clock, and the bells awoke me to a brand of pageantry previously unknown to me.  This happens in real life?  There are actual carriages?  Enormous dresses with twenty five foot trains? Trumpets?  Balconies for kissing?  I was charmed.  I spoke often and fondly of the Prince and Princess.  I’m pretty sure I even wrote the couple a letter or two.  I definitely collected books of their great day and honeymoon, and even had my own scrapbook filled with photos and news articles that I and my grandmother and whomever else I could enlist collected.

Then, in 1997, I found myself coming full circle, sleeping on the living room futon (Why do young people make the mistake of buying these?  Don’t do it!  They really are terribly impractical and even less comfortable!) in our apartment in Denver, to rise early one last time for Diana.  I cried a lot that morning, mourning a treasured part of my childhood as well as the unimaginable void in the lives of her two heartbroken young sons.

And to today.  I did not rise early but did manage to have perfect timing with a full recap of all the splendid moments.  Kate looked lovely (her dress exquisite and perfectly tailored), the Prince quite handsome (the red!), and both incredibly nervous and happy.  Bless their hearts, I can’t imagine having the whole world watch my wedding, though they would have gotten a good laugh when the ring would not go on the hubster’s finger and the judge whispered, rather pleaded, “Help her!”  A glorious day!  If only we’d had use of the Aston Martin with that JU5T WED plate.  That would have been the tops!

So my heart, as usual, is full.  I’ve seen the promise of a new life together, and illuminated bits of my own happy past, but I’ve one more, and it is rather good.  At my tenth high school reunion, my friend Kelli Edwards (now Capra) made a point to tell me she thought of me when Princess Diana died.  For me, it was the highlight of the trip.  She’d remembered after all those years.  I was deeply touched and remain so.  It is amazing how events like these touch our lives, adding something immaterial yet so tangible and dear.  Here’s to starting a new cycle of memories, ones to cherish, for sure.

I love you, our relationship, and how special every day with you is.  I love that we can get mad at each other without it hurting who we are together.  I love that you are handsome with your sparkly blue eyes. I love that you are taller than me and can reach items on the high shelf without a ladder.  I love that you take good care of yourself.  I love that you work to make our lives better. I love that you are generous and give good hugs.  I love that you are funny and make me laugh almost every day.  I love that we have the same values and sense of the world.  I love that you love computers and speak their language.  I love your scent, that sweet spot, just there, on your cheek.  I love that you’re learning to play the piano.  I love that you wonder.  I love that we cuddle every night in bed and in the mornings, too.  I love you.

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